tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25820335311256620452024-03-25T08:52:46.094-07:00Heeded WordsHeeded - "to pay a attention to; a process whereby a person concentrates on some features of the environment to the exclusion of others; take heed of my warning."
I would desire that my experiences would benefit those who read my words, that they may not have to walk down the paths that have taken me in a diverted direction. May they proceed on to further heights.Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-21075935232483042172014-04-11T04:43:00.001-07:002014-04-11T04:45:54.824-07:00Touching His Presence<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
February 10, 2014</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I had began searching harder, trusting
more, learning what faith meant. Today was one of those days of
willingness to find God. I knew He was there and I could always find
Him. But I needed more. I just needed a closer time with Him.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I was praising Him and dancing in joy
(yes, sometimes I dance, or try to) when I realized and saw a
movement that He was dancing with me. It was like a dove as I saw
the movement of light that followed it. It was so real I knew that I
could touch it. It was in the room. So excited and loved by His
encounter I fell to my knees, sobbing in repentance for not honoring
Him and recognizing the greatness of His position. How flippant I had
been. How humbled I was to recognize a little more how much God He
was. And then I felt a hunger like never before. It was coming from
my heart. I looked to see if it was a physical hunger, but it wasn't.
It was a deep crying thirst and I wanted, needed more. It was a deep
thirsting pain of needing more. That what I had was not going to make
it go away.
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I lay back for a while as I rested and
thought it just wasn't going to happen. Listening to the music and
then reading I got up to praise Him more when my heart broke. It
really broke. Thinking of my brother, I know it seems odd but I was
jealous that God took him and He didn't choose me. Not that I wanted
to die or that I wanted my brother to die, but just that my brother
must have been special for God to take him home. And that is when my
heart broke.
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxnQHi55ztiDScjuIqp66E5d9Pezzo4QFW1wSwFIu_FknJK-rmIfRliLtYgcOMEoJPMsulgq10drsd8-eIdYH-161hemmNTafsR-lT8Z1bGGsrWVvg7ZmxcFuWKRw6irPqeoJtFrINYvwJ/s1600/Holy-Spirit-Dove.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxnQHi55ztiDScjuIqp66E5d9Pezzo4QFW1wSwFIu_FknJK-rmIfRliLtYgcOMEoJPMsulgq10drsd8-eIdYH-161hemmNTafsR-lT8Z1bGGsrWVvg7ZmxcFuWKRw6irPqeoJtFrINYvwJ/s1600/Holy-Spirit-Dove.jpg" /></a>I wanted God to want ME!! I wanted Him
to WANT me!! How long had that been there? I had been searching for
God since I was young, trying to find Him in all the places I could.
All those nights, pleading for God to take away the desperate pain
inside, hoping for another day to survive. He would show me His
word. That He loved me. That kept me going .</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
God showed me that all those times
I wanted Him, it was really Him wanting me, reaching out to me. He
was drawing me to His love and healing. Oh that I would get away
from me and see Him.Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-23072921299414723282014-02-21T12:32:00.000-08:002014-02-21T13:12:38.332-08:00<h2>
When we are weak He is Strong</h2>
<div class="western">
Friday, February 14, 2003 6am</div>
<div class="western">
I woke up feeling like the little one, wanting her
daddy. She felt so little, so alone in the corner. She was crying to
be held. My adult mind couldn’t figure out how to meet this need.
It was such a strong physical need and it didn’t make sense how God
could meet that need. But finally I cried out to the heavenly Father
because I knew He knew. I felt Him prompting me to let her go sit in
the corner and He would come to her. So I did and while in the corner
this is what I saw (I think it was a vision but I have never had one
like this before) It was liked Jesus picked up the little girl and
stepped into the vision:
</div>
<div class="western">
<br /></div>
<div class="western">
<i>I looked and I saw tall office buildings in the
background being blown up. I asked Jesus what it was and He said
</i><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><i>“</i></span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">this
happened once before</span>.<i>” I asked what happened before? He
said, </i>“<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">What you have gone
through</span>.” <i>I thought He was taking me back to show me, so
I was looking to understand. Right in front of me were two men
fighting. It looked like He had taken me back to the middle of a war
zone. I kept asking who they were. Is that an angel, is it a man, who
are they and what happened once before? I remember thinking “is
this WWI or WWII.” And it came to me that this was WWI. I was
looking at the two men trying to see if I could see who they were.
As I continued to look at the two men, I saw that one had an army
uniform on and all of his gear. He was fighting with someone else. I
remember thinking, did someone in the war at that time go through the
same thing I am going through now? </i>
</div>
<div class="western">
<br /></div>
<div class="western">
<i>Jesus then came over and picked me up. He began
to carry me past the two men and I saw that the army man was fighting
with a demon because there was no light shining from him. As Jesus
continued to carry me, we passed through a narrow passageway with the
wounded sitting up against the walls. There was a lot of smoke and
dust from the fighting and explosions. I asked Jesus where He was
taking me and He said, </i>“<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">to
the front.</span>” <i>I asked him (I kept asking a lot of
questions) why He was taking me to the front. He said because I was
wounded. I didn’t understand and asked again why would He take me
to the front if I was wounded. Shouldn’t those who are really
strong and fighting be in the front? He said, “</i><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">no
it is because of your wounds that you are in the front. When you
become weak, I become strong.”</span></div>
<div class="western">
<br /></div>
<div class="western">
<i>When we got to the front of the war He sat me
down and began to walk away. I became afraid and asked why He was
leaving. I didn’t want Him to leave. “Why would you bring me to
the front of the battle and leave me? I want you here to feel your
presence.” And He said,</i> “<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">There
is a difference between feeling my presence and having my presence in
you. If you feel my presence around you than when it is gone you will
feel alone, but if I am in you than my presence is mighty.”</span>
<i>Jesus in me was stronger and more powerful than feeling Jesus
presence around me. </i>(<i>I remember thinking of feeling His
presence in the church service and thinking that He must be wanting
to do more than just have us feel His presence, which comes and
goes.) As Jesus was leaving I begin to understand that He was in me.
I was to abide in Him. He wasn’t leaving me, for I was in Him. A
child needs to feel His presence, but when no longer a child than I
and Him are one. I then was able to see that He needed to go get more
wounded to bring to the front. I also began to understand what He
meant by this happening before. WWI was the first war that He had
fought. He had taken me back to the war He had fought. It had
happened before because He had already gone through it. He was the
warrior, we were the wounded. </i>
</div>
<div class="western">
<br /></div>
<div class="western">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="western">
After the vision He encouraged me to rest, but I
was anxious to write about it. I asked Him why I was having a hard
time resting in His peace, and He said that when anyone experiences
God the natural feeling is to get excited and want to share it. </div>
Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-74659452248707067712014-02-21T12:23:00.000-08:002014-02-21T12:23:32.615-08:00<h2>
<i>God's Presence and the Fiery Tongue</i></h2>
<i>After much time in prayer, I experienced what I felt was a drunkenness in the Spirit. It was like a heaviness that made it hard to hold my head up and a loss of inhibitions, although my mind was quite clear. I picked up a long pole that my son had left in the living room. I held onto it so that I would not fall as I walked around the room. After much pleading for assurance that God would give me the courage or whatever I needed to do His will, I heard my spirit, who was standing next to me on my left, say to Him “Yes, Lord” three times. Although I did not hear what God said, I knew that He had assured us. I knew then that I could relax in Him. I fell to the floor.</i><br />
<div>
<i><br /></i>
<div>
<i>As I lay on the floor I felt that my</i><i> tongue had been cut out. As I lay dazed and drunk, I saw a fiery tongue flash across the dark room. In a silly drunken daze I commented to God that He missed me. But then I saw my spirit, who was sitting to the left of me, reach over and grab it and place it where my tongue had been missing. Shortly after, as I lay wondering if this was for real, I sat up and realized that the mist and heaviness in the room was gone. The room had become quite clear. I then knew without a doubt that His presence had been in the room.</i></div>
</div>
<div>
<i><br /></i></div>
<div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
The next Sunday, a friend shared with
me that being drunk in the Spirit was like an anesthetic for the
removal of my tongue and the replacement of the fiery tongue. That
next week God began to reveal some things to me. One of the first,
was a song He had put on my heart about six weeks prior to that
night. It was called “Set my soul afire.” The song talks about
putting a burning desire in our soul to witness. I tried for some
time to get it off my mind, but eventually felt like God meant it as
a prayer for me. The first thing I realized from the song was that
God had separated my soul and spirit and secondly that the fiery
tongue was placed on my soul. As in the song, He was setting my soul
afire. He was renewing a burning desire for those who are lost.
Another thing that I realized was that GOD had put the song on my
heart and placed it as a prayer. The song was His desire not mine
AND He was answering the prayer He had put on my heart.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
The next thing that God showed me that
week was out of a study that I was helping Shirley Carpenter with. I
mistakenly did the wrong chapter, but not according to God. It was
out of her book <u>The Rock Garden Locked</u>, a chapter called
Chrysolite - A Consuming Fire. In that chapter she mentions Matt.
3:11, where John the Baptist talks of the one who will baptize with
the Holy Spirit and fire. Was not God earlier this year leading me to
seek baptism? She also mentions Acts 2:2-3, about the tongues as of
fire. She talked about the refining fire and consuming fire.
Another thing she mentioned in that chapter was that during a study
she found out that the word glory literally means weight or to be
heavy. Was it the glory of God in the room that made it feel heavy?</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Now I can’t say that I truly
understand all that nor that I clearly understand what God really
wanted me to know from it. But what I do know is that, what happened
that night was from God, that it was from His word, and that He meant
it as another step in my training for His work. The whole idea of
what fire does has opened up a new understanding of God.</div>
</div>
Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-15585053531646150742014-02-21T12:10:00.002-08:002014-02-21T12:10:32.863-08:00<h2>
Encountering the Presence of God</h2>
I was twenty-two and although I was very active in church, the pain that I had suffered with for years, tugged heavily at my heart. I was attending a crusade and as the music played I sought desperately for just a moment of relief from years of suffering. It was early in the evening and the crusade had barely started. Finally the anger at God was too much and with a frustrated attitude I bolted off the bleachers and headed for my car. As I hurried for my car, a young woman scurried to catch up with me as I saw her trying to put her shoes on. As she approached me she said, “I knew God wanted me to talk with you, but I wasn’t expecting you to leave so fast and I didn't even have my shoes on.” As she walked beside me, she began to ask how I was doing and if there was anything she could do. I had never seen this person and I couldn’t understand why she was taking the time to come after me. After talking for a few minutes, she asked if I wanted to come back to her apartment with her. I agreed and we decided to go in her car.<br /><br />As we left the crusade and headed for her apartment complex, I realized we were heading to the very same apartment complex I had first lived in when I had moved back to Oklahoma. I had not been back in over a year and half. But as we got out of the car, it was more astonishing as she lead us to the very apartment that I had lived in a year and half ago! She said she was from Tulsa and was visiting some friends. As she lead me inside I felt the familiarity of the place and the amazing coincidence of what was happening. She turned on a dim light and picked out a record to play. As she was picking out the record she began to share how much she liked this music and that there was a special part with words she wanted me to hear. As we sat in the dimly lit room and listened to the music, I found a peace and a presence of the Spirit that was out of time with who I was. After sharing the music, she asked if I wanted to pray with her. With such a sweetness in the room, I found no hesitation. It was as though there could be no room for pain or anger in the room. As she began to pray, she began to sing the most beautiful song in a tongue I did not know. I had never been with anyone who had prayed in another tongue, much less who could sing in one! But it was the most beautiful music I had ever heard. To this day I still remember the beauty of the words as she sang them. It was like a song that was scripted out just for me. Then she began to pray words of encouragement with a sweetness that could only touch me with a sense of awe. After a wonderful time in prayer she took me back to the crusade to get my car, just as every one was leaving. She asked me if I wanted to come over the next day for a few hours and I agreed.<br /><br />The next day was Saturday and I went over in the late morning. She was heading for the pool and asked me to come along. We sat on the edge of the pool as we dangled our feet in the water. It wasn’t what I had known about laying out at the pool, it was more like sitting beside the pool of ***. As I looked at her, I saw a beauty deeper than I had ever known. She had soft black hair against her beautiful fair skin and she moved with an ease and contentment. And the peace from last night still glowed about her. As we sat sharing the morning, I watched her share Jesus with those who came by. It was such a peaceful way of sharing or encouraging. I had never nor ever met anyone who cared so deeply and shared about Jesus so naturally. She finally told me she had to head back home. I never saw her again or her friends. <br /><br />Now I don’t know much about angels, but if I was ever to think that I was to meet an angel unaware, she would have been one. And at the time, I really wondered. I am awed by what happened as I look back today as much as I was then. Perhaps more so.Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-50228605382741014812014-01-15T10:05:00.000-08:002014-01-15T10:05:31.431-08:00Learning to wait on God in 25 MinutesGuess you have to start somewhere. I am sure God starts with something small and doesn't expect us to put too much on the line for a big loss eh?<br />
<br />
So I arrive at the doctors building at 9:15 for an appointment at 9:45 a.m. The building is busy with at least 30 cars moving through the large parking lot hoping to catch an opening to park. I had never thought about talking to God about a parking space before, at least seriously, but I was under pressure to get to an appointment and so I asked God about it.<br />
<br />
1) My first thought was to ask God - "Do You even care about a parking space?" and of course I felt He assured me that He cared about all things about me.<br />
<br />
2) Secondly, I thought about, "Do You really answer prayers about things like this?" and He reminded me 'Ask and you shall receive.' So I figured I probably should ask. So I prayed and asked God for a parking space.<br />
<br />
3) Then I began to wonder if I truly believed He would give me a parking space. I felt that I didn't deserve to get a parking space since there were so many others sicker than I that needed one. But in my heart God reminded me that they could ask Him for one too and He would give it to them.<br />
<br />
4) I began to get really frustrated with all these people pushing to get a parking space and knew anger and frustration would hinder God answering my prayer, so I made sure to release any frustration at them and God again reminded me about His love and concern for everyone under pressure to get to their appointments. I then felt a compassion for all of us on this same path.<br />
<br />
5) As I continued to drive through the parking lot looking for someone to come to their car I realized we were all ready to pounce on the next person out the door headed for their car. Realizing I needed to wait on God (the parking space was coming for Him and the four cars in front of me would pounce first anyway), I slowed down and waited for what God would do next. It would have to be by chance (or God of course) to be the one right in front of the person getting in the car. So I wait.<br />
<br />
6) But does waiting mean it could be until the last possible minute - and could I wait or just leave and go find a parking space in the neighborhood and walk half a mile. That is my first instinct - to book it out of here and make sure I got to my appointment on time. But I reminded God promised to answer our prayer and we must wait upon Him.<br />
<br />
7) So what is waiting? Expecting Him to come through? I am reminded He has to get all things aligned. So I choose to trust Him and wait. I keep driving slowly - waiting for the parking space He has provided. The minutes ticking by as my chance to be on time is passing. But I keep listening to Him. Remembering His words that He will provide if we ask. It is all about expectation.<br />
<br />
8) And then there it is - an older lady pushing an older man in a wheelchair as the other cars pass them by, slowing down to see if they are positioned right for the grab. As their opportunity is missed, I slow down to wait on the couple as they go to a car on my left. Perfect timing, perfect position. I know in my heart that God provided. Sure I may have happenstanced upon one but this one was definitely from God. So I thanked Him for it.<br />
<br />
9) As I check in at my appointment I hear a frustrated guy behind me complaining about the parking and how he drove 2 hours to get here and then another hour driving around looking for a parking space. And that his wife was still out there driving around..<br />
<br />
It wasn't an easy process and I had to rely on God continuously as I fought the urge to do it my way. And through this I pray I can take more things to Him.Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-82251967764987310142011-02-10T12:49:00.000-08:002011-02-10T12:49:43.267-08:00Remind Me Dear LordWords from the song: <i>Remind Me Dear Lord </i>by Dottie Rambo<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;">The things that I love and hold dear to my heart are just borrowed,</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; color: blue;"> they're not mine at all. Jesus only let me use them to brighten my life, </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; color: blue;"> So remind me, remind me dear Lord.</span><br />
<i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Roll back the curtain of memory now and then,</span></i><br />
<i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Show me where You brought me from, and where I could have been;</span></i><br />
<i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Remember I'm human, and humans forget;</span></i><br />
<i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> So remind me, remind me, dear Lord.</span></i><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Nothing good have I done to deserve God's own Son;</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> I'm not worthy of the scars in His hands, Yet He chose the road to </span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Calvary to die in my stead; Why he loved me, I can't understand.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> <i> Roll back the curtain of memory now and then,</i></span></span><br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Show me where You brought me from, and where I could have been;</span></i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> Remember I'm human, and humans forget;</span></i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><i style="background-color: white;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"> So remind me, remind me, dear Lord.</span></i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #20124d;"><i><br />
</i></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">About 20 years ago as I was going through recovery from a past wound, I would sit at the piano and play this song over and over as tears would stream down my face. I was feeling God's love as I became aware of how much He loved me. I felt the love that I did not deserve.; the acceptance from one who I could never repay; a gratefulness as I remembered how far out of the darkness He had brought me. It was healing for me and once when a friend heard me playing, was drawn to know the Jesus who could love me in my darkest moment. She too found Jesus and the healing and love she had never know. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Today I sit at the piano and find myself aware of the first verse. Although I knew the first verse I have never felt the precious grasp that things dear to my heart could hold. I am reminded of not only how much I love them, I am also reminded of how they really aren't mine, I only have them to brighten my life. I can't hold onto them too tight. As I have learned to open my heart to love, I must also learn to bear the pain that love holds. For with every love that is poured out and a bond that connects, there is pain as those bonds change. As children grow a parents love for them seeks to hold on, but growth comes in letting go. Whether that is a child, grandchild, family or friend, when we pour in love, as some point we must let that one that we love grow so they too can love. And I wonder if that means letting go of what we had before as we reach for what is ahead..... I wonder if God had to let go of Jesus so that Jesus could pour out His love for us.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">How interesting that God keeps me in His watch. Just as I poured over that song 20 years ago, I found it 40 years ago not understanding the true meaning of it or how much I would connect to it. Even then I hung onto the song because it drew me to the love of the One I was seeking. I didn't know that I would have to be reminded of how much He loved me or the road He would take down or how much I would need Him when I loved.</div>Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-89023989144229529222009-06-30T07:00:00.000-07:002009-07-11T04:35:26.971-07:00Remember This Generation!!A voice was heard in Ramah,<br />Weeping and great mourning,<br />Rachel weeping for her children;<br />And she refused to be comforted,<br />Because they were no more.<br />Matthew 2:18<br /><br />Where is the Rachel’s who are weeping for our children? We do not weep for we are the ones who have given the order to kill our children. There is no weeping for we are the guilty ones. The children were not taken from us, we ordered them removed.<br /><br />Where are the father’s weeping for our children? We are not weeping for we are the ones who stood by and let our children be killed. The protecting father took no action. We are the guilty ones.<br /><br />Where is the church weeping for her children? We are not weeping, for we have watched and silently stood by while millions upon millions of babies have been taken from this generation.<br /><br />As the Rachel’s have taken the lie of freedom, the lie that abortion will free them from shame, free them from responsibility, free them to live for themselves; the fathers have taken the lie that it was Rachel’s action, Rachel’s guilt of responsibility. And the church, the church has given their responsibility over to democracy. Democracy demands the freedom given to the group. Let the group, the nation decide. So where does God come in? When does God’s word become truth that stands above the nation?<br /><br />A nation for the people; but what happens when the people, the fathers, the Rachels have been deceived? Wake up church, the enemy is in our midst. Your vote will not conquer him. Your programs, classes, marches; your guns will not conquer him. He abides inside the church. He has blinded you with apathy, he has bound you with guilt, he has bombarded you with programs and has stolen your time. Wake up church, the enemy has infiltrated your organization with corporate lies.<br /><br />My dear Rachels, fathers; God is crying out for your children. He seeks your heart. He wants to reunite you with your little ones. They are not gone, they are in His hands. He holds the multitude of little ones, as He cries for what we have done. Don’t let this generation of lost ones go unnoticed.Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-47548027676421610472009-06-29T20:48:00.000-07:002009-06-29T21:36:34.391-07:00God's Healing AbilityAbout 4 years ago I went to a conference to learn how to pray for healing. It was a wonderful teaching and I had some wonderful spritiual experiences. I learned that as we pray for others that God may give us a word or picture of an ailment that would reveal God is wanting to heal someone of that ailment.<br /><br />After the conference I stayed an extra night before flying home. During that evening I had a intense, impacting dream. I do not remember all it, but I dreamed that I saw a person with a dark covering over their back. The darkness covered their back and about halfway down their arms. As I looked closer I saw the person was covered in what looked like black scales. As I was watching I saw one of the scales move and realized they were dark creatures that was covering the person's back and arms. I woke up feeling the intense awareness of so many creatures that had this person covered. I felt for sure it must be demonic attacks upon this person. All I would have to do is pray for these things to be gone and the person would be healed.<br /><br />The next day I went to the church service and wondered if God wanted to heal someone of perhaps a skin disease. I never saw someone to pray for and with intense awareness I continued to look for someone to pray for on my trip home and on into the coming months. No one every came across my path and I just could not understand why God would reveal such a dream if He wasn't going to heal anyone.<br /><br />That was 4 years ago.<br /><br />I have become aware that the destiny God has for me has been hindered by my health. I have energy at times but it has not been consistant enough to go forward in His work. As I have continued to pray about it, God has let me see that there is a spiritual connection to my feelings of apathy and fatigue. So tonight I again began a spiritual battle (in prayer and worship) against this spirit of infirmity (infirmity meaning weakness, etc). As I began to pray I began to fight against the enemy that wanted to discourage me. I would get discouraged through a feeling of apathy to pray or tiredness or disbelief that prayer wasn't getting me anywhere. But I became more aware it was the enemy causing these thoughts and feeling of apathy. I felt the heaviness I was fighting was an enemy on my back. But I couldn't fight it face to face, it was subtle and unapproachable. It had an advantage because it was on my back and I couldn't get to it.<br /><br />As I felt the tiredness of my back, I remembered the dream I had 4 years ago. Thoughts would cross my mind that the person in the dream with the creatures on their back was me, but I would fight it because I didn't want to believe it. I kept pressing on to know the truth but still not wanting to believe that that person could be me until I finally began to pray that God would not let me be blinded by the enemy or hidden under this blanket of darkness. I did not want to stay under it any longer.<br /><br />And then He let me see what it was. All those hundreds of black scales/creatures were the hundreds of time that I chose death over life, all those times I was coming into agreement with the enemy. I sought to die, to kill myself almost daily, coming into agreement with the enemy, over and over. Everytime I chose death, I rejected life; I rejected the Life. Jesus is Life, I was rejecting Him. In humble repentence I ask Jesus's forgivenness as each rememberance of wanting death came to my mind, taking pills, seeking death in so many ways. Then I felt my body relax in His presence. <br /><br />It is not easy fighting an enemy on your back. I know the work isn't complete, but the burden is lighter and He will finish the work. It is not easy to see what we don't want to see. But I know God overcomes and I want His victory.Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-25054579645114494802009-03-18T06:14:00.000-07:002020-04-30T05:40:30.028-07:00Are we heading toward utopia?I have wondered recently why we have children in our 20-30's, which is a time when we struggle most with our own identity and life issues. Why do our children have to get the brunt of our frustration and struggles? Why are they stuck in our influence at a time when our annoyances and idiosyncrasies are overly pronounced? <br />
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Is it not at this time in our children's lives that they will take on those influences and struggles? And then do they not carry on the same to pass on to their children? What is the purpose of passing on down the struggles and influences that our parents have passed on to us? Why do we as adults have to wait until our 30-and 40's to come to terms with our life to settle down and define our ideology? (exceptions excluded of course)<br />
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First of all, if our children did not struggle with our influence, what would they struggle with? Can a generation address self issues at such an early age that it would no longer be passed to the next generation? If their struggles had already been addressed what would they proceed on toward? What could they accomplish? It appears that generations do address some issues, specifically social ones that reposition society but then those issues seem to bring an abundance more issues. Is that an essence of life? Are we meant to know struggles, obstacles and seek to overcome them? Or are generations on a continuous road to utopia? And hasn't that been discussed before?<br />
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Perhaps we will never seek utopia, but if we were to address these struggles (rooted in lies of course) would we be a people that comes closer to truth and The Truth (Jesus)?Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-74637536141748327832009-01-16T08:38:00.000-08:002009-01-16T17:02:57.745-08:00You know you are Acclimated to Oklahoma when. . .<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDsYZl3TW5PFbo8WC1Y2AHIRJDrrz6n4D5mRz5gmhSbzrsBPTCAFR1FNqO5qBSM-i6XaTNnsCC3iZsYPu-ebuEoNyBkucr1JCMTT_ASJ0elibuQSet__c8BVeYI2ge1CfguTcX47XMzCqQ/s1600-h/from+online.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5291941956760940274" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 240px" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDsYZl3TW5PFbo8WC1Y2AHIRJDrrz6n4D5mRz5gmhSbzrsBPTCAFR1FNqO5qBSM-i6XaTNnsCC3iZsYPu-ebuEoNyBkucr1JCMTT_ASJ0elibuQSet__c8BVeYI2ge1CfguTcX47XMzCqQ/s320/from+online.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnJnppvZG6wORsU4JANuJ-NxuebO_3IIJDlWFhGHU_40C33ThbUjm9UhbEIW3aKPGP0aNBtg-ngPkCRFxHcIOOhy33tY6HhDAwIDOjTCK5TEhpKeNK65fcP2FWcwYZic7KNMk91ZlHfgb1/s1600-h/100_1402.JPG"></a><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6mxu0jUMnoAlx7H4zAA8cPalcUm_M06SasFHbR-i_RmloHdy2zip1etOHXmr5BmS7p2A7CysktRiokXkfWtIVpsdIB4BKUvfGOW8Vx_7AoZtCYm1Y-vRxwYR2EU0zyrYfc3AInm3gMaW6/s1600-h/100_1365.JPG"></a><div><br /><br /><br /></div><ul><br /><br /><br /><li></li><li></li><li></li><li></li><li></li><li>You set your thermostat between 65-68 to reduce your heating bill</li><br /><li>You give up going barefoot to 2 layers of socks and fuzzy houseshoes</li><br /><li>You know that getting together means the whole family 30-50 is coming over!</li><br /><li>Every event involves southern, mouth watering foods - OK rates in the bottom 3% for health</li><br /><li>Stopping to help when you are in a car accident or broken down is NORMAL</li><br /><li>Dripping water faucets is a must during freezing days</li><br /><li>Tomorrow the weather will be warmer (or colder) - never the same</li><br /><li>The sun will always shine (even while snowing)</li><br /><li>Football is not just a game</li><br /><li>Having a truck makes you a man</li></ul><p>*Oklahoma rates #1 out of 50 states with the least women who have never married - ladies you have a chance!! Hey, I have a chance!!!</p></div>Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2582033531125662045.post-37082734716374085402009-01-15T06:48:00.000-08:002020-04-30T05:51:00.262-07:00Is God not Enough?<br />
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Words have not come easy for me lately. Sometimes I think I have opened myself up, searched within, torn away the struggles so much that what is left to say? Even with others, do we not have an ulterior motive when we seek to commune with them? Perhaps I have fought to break through for so long, that existing and abiding in peace is a new thing for me. NO I don't think it is being in "<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">lala" </span>land, I do abide in the present. However if I know that I can no longer change those around me nor have walls to break through (per say) then what is left to motivate me forward or maybe its inward.<br />
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It is this exact place that I find myself with God. A couple of prophetic words that were given me a few years ago bring me to this very position:<br />
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<em>Elise, I want you to know, He has called you to be a worshiper of Him. To seek His face, just to rest in Him and to abide in Him. Not to be afraid of what other people think. Be drawn away, drawn into His presence, in the quietness, in the stillness. Jim</em><br />
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<em>Elise, Each as been given a gift/calling, God has called you to minister to God’s heart. Some people are there just to minister to God’s heart. God called you to minister to God’s heart. Others things He may call you to do but I sense this is a main calling in your life. Pauline</em><br />
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First of all, what in the world does a calling or gift to basically minister and worship God mean? And what do you do with it? Am I called to stay in the closest and seek His face? Now some people may desire to stay in a closet, alone with God (wouldn't that be AMAZING!! ALONE WITH THE GOD OF THE UNIVERSE?). However, being alone in a "closet", without anyone knowing the deep sacrifice, without anyone knowing what your prayers may effect or change grates against my basic desires. Does God call us outside our natural drive? Every deep experience I have with God excites me to explode and share it with others. But it seems that some experiences just can't be shared with others. You can try to explain it but it seems to fall flat on its face in front of you. Which brings me to the abiding question that God has been continually laying before me - Am I not enough?<br />
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Is God not enough? Now basically Jesus has commanded us to go and make disciples, He has sent us as the Father sent Him. So He hasn't called us to stay in the closet. And yet I am sure it is in the closet where we must first find Him, for it is His disciples we are to make. And aren't we all called to worship and minister before Him. So the real problem I think for me is that there are still parts of me that want to be acknowledged for the prayer time and sacrifice I make to Him. I want to be acknowledged for being special because of the wonderful, amazing experiences I have with Him (how ugly is that). And if that is what God has called me to do, at the least, I need to be satisfied there, before I can go out from there. Being in the closet would be wonderful, but would you want to be stuck there, if that were your calling? How long can you stay in the closet in prayer? Minutes, daily, ongoing? (apart from kids and life demands)<br />
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To be acknowledged means I want others to notice my value. And of course if I am seeking value from others than God is not enough. If I am seeking any of these things from others, than God is not enough. It is not that others can't give us wonderful relationships and experiences, it is that we seek from them what God wants to give us and be to us within our relationship with Him. So for me, I know I must first let go of my need for attention, value and being special from others and God wants me to seek from Him and that He wants to give me. Can I trust that He is enough?<br />
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The other thing I struggle with (I do have struggles!) is, how do I balance my desire to share the gospel to others with my desire to be with God, the God of the universe!! It is not with time spent, it is with the deep desire within me that I struggle. I think for me the struggle is with the doing and performance part of going. I know that God must go with us and the two should not be separate, however, how do I go forward with the power of God and not just doing the work myself.<br />
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So if I know that God has the power to change things, heal and move mountains and I know it is in my faith in Him that He works through me and I know it is His word that moves my faith, so what else could be the problem with Him in the closet? Perhaps I want His power to go before me rather than allowing His power to go in me. Perhaps I think I must have to stay in the closet so He can go forward, which He could but He wants to be with us. If we do not work separately, than I must let go of my desire for recognition to allow God (OF THE UNIVERSE) and His power to abide <em>in</em> me. This is humbleness of course, recognizing who is doing the work anyway. We can ask God to move mountains (and that is good) but I also think He wants <em>us</em> to move mountains by His power within us.<br />
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After all these years, am I learning the basics of faith again? If I step forward to act and do, am I doing my Fathers work? Do I just trust that what I do, I do in Him. Not for me. I have not learned that level of trust yet. I must hear from within, where the peace abides, I must see what He is doing and then I can do.<br />
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<em>Matthew 13:15b</em><br />
<em>Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.</em></div>
Elise Damarishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07157839404010162411noreply@blogger.com0